E=MC2, Conspiracy Theory and More!

E=MC2, Conspiracy Theory and More!

I know i've spoken of bars a lot on this site, but i can't help it.

i hate clubs like the pat and the scuz and especially the longbranch. hate them

i asked my friend nathan what is his usually strategy when he gets suckered into going to a club like the pat or something?

and he said:

Nathan: "well usually i aim to get ridiculously wasted"

Me:"yeah so do i, i cannot go to a bar sober... ever. by the end of the night i jsut want to shoot someone in the face or atleast bust someone's lip.. the biggest problem with that approach to bars though is it turns into a pretty expensive night so that you can barely tolerate the bar"


and then i realized something

it all came together in that exact instant

over a year of me trying to deduce why i hate the bar so much, and like einstein figured out e=mc2 i discovered the behind the scenes logic of the bar.


and here it is...

the bars do it on purpose:

they purposely play shitty music, attract ugly sluts, and chachy douchebag guys, and etc... so that when relatively normal guys like myself or anyone else go to these clubs they have to spend a ridiculous amount of cash so that we are able to just barely tolerate a night there.

and it makes perfect sense

it's the perfect economic strategy

because see the "regulars" that go to clubs don't need to lay down a whack of cash to enjoy themselves, because they love it there! they spend maybe 30 bucks occasionally maybe more depending on how many drinks they buy for random women they will never talk to.

and then there's me



and this is what the bars plan on. and while nathan disagrees as he thinks the bars don't even notice that we are a major source of their income... which is ridiculous.. they know, they know.. they plan on it.

and this theory explains why there are so many fights at the bar, all the guys that fight are just normal guys who couldn't get enough to drink.. they got tired of being bumped into all night, tired of fucking black eyed peas and 50 cent, tired of ugly sluts asking them to dance and they snapped. i frankly don't blame em, i've come close on many occasions myself. if i weighed more and had a thicker neck i'd be in with them on that course of action.

see and people alcohol doesn't solve problems... well it doesn't, but it makes your problems much mmore tolerable.

...usually

for example when i was at a certain someone’s birthday and i knew there were going to people i hated i automatically tore jay's whisky bottle of out of his hands and took a good chunk out of that sucker so that i could survive the night. and I did. i listened to a guy that told me how he could kill a man with his bare hands in one move and then that if anyone who messed with him that person would be guaranteed dead.. actually dead not just a metaphorically.

see i saved my life with alcohol, because when sober i may have been tempted to laugh. and could possibly be in a garbage disposal bin right now...

saves lives.. sometimes...

(the picture is a tribute to one of the best video games ever created, but none of you will know it so i'll just say it: full throttle. best game ever!)