Dodging Bullets and Assholism 101
Dodging bullets and Assholism 101
Soo… last night I dodged the epitome of bullets, out of the many types of social bullets that one can be taken down by I dodged one of the nastiest: the legendary third wheel.
Frick I don’t know a person on this earth who can withstand a hit by the third wheel… and if they are okay with being a third wheel they have serious problems.
Anyway, so earlier this week this girl asked me if I wanted to go to the drag-queen thing with her and her girlfriend at louis on Saturday- a girl that previously I had been interested in… and then things suddenly became complicated and now she’s dating some guy from some place somewhere, but we still hang out.
Anyway earlier in the week I agreed, and then last night before I was leaving to her house she said:
"when you get here we’ll pre-drink and then walk to louis from here"
no indication that "we’ll" was implying me her and her boyfriend. No indication whatsoever.
Right before I’m about to leave by some fluke or off-chance that god has love for me somehow charyce phones me and decides to come out with us.
That my friends is a matrix style dodging of a bullet, with the whole slow motion flailing of the arms.
Because these two on the whole way they were hand in hand giggling to Louis. Which brings me to my next point:
It’s fun being a jackass, it’s even funnier when you meet someone and for the first time and they get nothing but subtle hostility…. For no reason.
eg: of being your run of the mill jackass:
We are walking over the university bridge and the guy says
Dude: "I kinda wanna jump just to see what would happen"
Me: "you know you should do it! You know I’d actually pay really good money for you to do it, how about what 80 bucks?"
As I fist through my wallet
Dude: I dunno if I could deal with the hypothermia though
Me: you look tough I’m sure you could take it
Dude: I’m pretty sure it doesn’t matter how tough you are when it comes to hypothermia
Me: fine don’t do it, but john wayne would have done it.
And actually I was pretty much like that the whole way with many other examples of lesser amusement, I’m sure he might have been a nice guy, but it’s too bad it was me who was there, and I still resort to childish jealousy and snide comments.
Mind you had I been the third wheel walking all the way to louis, it would have been me climbing over and into the South Saskatchewan river- for no money.
It turned out to be a good night overall, but shit i can't believe she just about did that to me... taking someone unknowingly out anywhere as a third wheel just reaffirms any thoughts that person had about suicide.
end of story
Soo… last night I dodged the epitome of bullets, out of the many types of social bullets that one can be taken down by I dodged one of the nastiest: the legendary third wheel.
Frick I don’t know a person on this earth who can withstand a hit by the third wheel… and if they are okay with being a third wheel they have serious problems.
Anyway, so earlier this week this girl asked me if I wanted to go to the drag-queen thing with her and her girlfriend at louis on Saturday- a girl that previously I had been interested in… and then things suddenly became complicated and now she’s dating some guy from some place somewhere, but we still hang out.
Anyway earlier in the week I agreed, and then last night before I was leaving to her house she said:
"when you get here we’ll pre-drink and then walk to louis from here"
no indication that "we’ll" was implying me her and her boyfriend. No indication whatsoever.
Right before I’m about to leave by some fluke or off-chance that god has love for me somehow charyce phones me and decides to come out with us.
That my friends is a matrix style dodging of a bullet, with the whole slow motion flailing of the arms.
Because these two on the whole way they were hand in hand giggling to Louis. Which brings me to my next point:
It’s fun being a jackass, it’s even funnier when you meet someone and for the first time and they get nothing but subtle hostility…. For no reason.
eg: of being your run of the mill jackass:
We are walking over the university bridge and the guy says
Dude: "I kinda wanna jump just to see what would happen"
Me: "you know you should do it! You know I’d actually pay really good money for you to do it, how about what 80 bucks?"
As I fist through my wallet
Dude: I dunno if I could deal with the hypothermia though
Me: you look tough I’m sure you could take it
Dude: I’m pretty sure it doesn’t matter how tough you are when it comes to hypothermia
Me: fine don’t do it, but john wayne would have done it.
And actually I was pretty much like that the whole way with many other examples of lesser amusement, I’m sure he might have been a nice guy, but it’s too bad it was me who was there, and I still resort to childish jealousy and snide comments.
Mind you had I been the third wheel walking all the way to louis, it would have been me climbing over and into the South Saskatchewan river- for no money.
It turned out to be a good night overall, but shit i can't believe she just about did that to me... taking someone unknowingly out anywhere as a third wheel just reaffirms any thoughts that person had about suicide.
end of story
posted by Doc at
1:13 PM
10 Comments:
haha yea i've been there before many a time.
being a dick is cool.
So whats his name? Dillon?
Deven
whatever!
By
joe, at 2:05 PM
brian or something like that
By
Anonymous, at 3:23 PM
i'm tellin' you, use that line its golden
actually better yet take no advice from me. Whatever i'd do, do the opposite.
By
joe, at 4:35 PM
what are you and co. doing this weekend, esp. friday?
By
joe, at 9:17 PM
probably getting drunk and ponder where exactly did i go wrong in life...
seriously though i don't have plans, prolly do something with evan before he leaves to new jersey...
which reminds me joel, i do have this thing at home- perhaps you may have have heard of it... in fact it was invented by a rather famous canadian not too long ago: the name Alexander Graham Bell ring a bell? terrible pun i know; someone shoot me, and in the face none of this pussy wounding shit.
By
Doc, at 10:28 PM
im not going to phone you 5 days in advance
esp. considering we dont know what we are doing yet
but boins' birthday is on friday. drinking to insue. film at 11.
By
joe, at 10:46 PM
Im sure that Lib buddy is going to have something going on on friday night considering it will be the last time we see him for like 8 months.
LDUB
By
Anonymous, at 11:03 PM
true
wheres he going? i was hoping to amalgamate
By
joe, at 12:32 AM
I think that either Lydias or Winstons since its cheep import night. Both ways one can get drunk so it works for me.
LDUB
By
Anonymous, at 11:55 PM
yea thats where boins wans to go, we'll figure it out
By
joe, at 12:09 AM
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